Don’t Do It, Fellas!


I was at the Hilton Hotel partaking in a lunch buffet. The crowd was larger than I expected for a Thursday, but I decided to give it a go any way.

As I was fixing a salad, my attention was caught by a young lady and a young man standing to my left.

I watched that young man make an almost deadly mistake. Now, I know young people don’t think before doing certain things, but he almost didn’t come back from this one, folks. This guy did something that can get you killed quicker than wrong answers to 21 Questions on Falen’s FB page.

This guy asked a lady, who was not pregnant, when she was due.

It’s as if the entire restaurant went silent.

The lady’s left temple started throbbing on her forehead. Her right eye twitched as her head turned towards the guy in an owl-like fashion.

“And why do you think I’m pregnant?” she asked in a calm-before-the-storm-voice.

I started thinking to myself, “Dude, act like you didn’t hear her and just return to your table.”

But, of course, being young and stupid, he tried to explain, “Well, I didn’t mean that. I just thought… Well… I’m just sayin’…”

This lady went off on this dude like he’d left only a swallow of orange juice in the container (That’s a “Harlem Nights” reference for those of you paying attention — You need Netflix in your life).

After the guy took his 10 second verbal beating like a man, he smiled, apologized and proceeded to move on to another part of the buffet.

To all of my young male blog readers: if you see a woman with a larger-than-usual stomach. PLEASE do not assume that she is pregnant. Keep your comments to yourself! I don’t care if you see a baby’s foot sticking out of the zipper of her pants, do not assume she is with child.

DON’T DO IT, FELLAS! If you have done this before, then join our discussion here!

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